Reflecting on my Residency at Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn

My creative reflections were all discussed in my previous blog post. I discovered more than just artistic revelations on my residency.

Now I am back from Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn in Cumbria, I am pushed back into city life. I have had a lovely bath and snuggled in my own bed, however, it is the simplicity of Merz Barn I am missing.

It has been amazing to retreat for a week. 

I loved the fresh air, fresh eggs, the DIY approach. I enjoyed cooking vegetarian food with Alana and our evenings of chat.

I thought pictures would do more justice than words to my time spent at the Merz Barn between 13th - 19th October 2014.

Thank you Ian and Celia xx 

 

 

Day 7 - Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn Residency

On the last day on my residency at the Merz Barn in Cumbia it was time to reflect on my thoughts over the duration of the week. As I mentioned in a previous post, I had stapled a huge sheet of plastic to one of the gallery walls and had been writing the contents of my head on it all week with a permanent marker pen. It had grown quite a lot, as I had added to it whenever creatively conducive thoughts popped into my brain.

At the beginning I really struggled to write anything, but by reading, thinking and talking I managed to squeeze out lots of interesting ideas, starting points, questions and suggestions.

Before I set off to the Merz Barn, I had been questioning what, how, when, where.... I had been trying to think about my practice conceptually, formally and aesthetically and question myself on all accounts. I was trying to get to the bottom of why I was doing what I was doing, without losing any integrity and my personal interests: - I wanted to come away from the residency with some starting points for the future, not end points to a final work or to draw a conclusion. I wanted this residency to help challenge my ideas of thinking and allow me time to question my main concerns.

 

On the last day of my residency, Mark Devereux of Mark Devereux Projects was due to visit both fellow resident artist and buddy Alana Tyson and I for a critical feedback session. Alana laid out her works in the gallery space and I was ready to show Mark some of the photographic projects I had done over the course of the week - it was the sheet of plastic with my scribbles on that he was more interested in talking about.

Firstly, he asked me to talk through everything I had written down and add to the diagram if I needed. By saying my internalized thoughts out loud, I heard them for the first time (sounds obvious, I know). I further emptied my head during our conversation - this was a relief as it had been swirling for weeks regarding the questioning of my practice. Mark added to the wall diagram, picking out pivotal things I was saying and adding his ideas too. By the end of the session my mind was spinning again but this time in a good way instead of a confused way.

I had begun to realise what my focus was; I had even managed to pin it down to just one word: Luminous! I had thought about which of my previous works were the strongest and why, I had clearer ideas for the future and for possible lines of inquiry, I also had room to add to the sheet; which is exactly what I am going to do when I get back into my studio at Rogue.

It was through externalising my thoughts that I had come to realise that it wasn't the objects within my work that was of deep interest; they have been there as a device to stabilize the lighting elements and to create bridges for the colours to balance from. It is the purity of colour and how it effects our senses within an immersive environment that is of real interest. How do different colours affect us mentally, psychically and spiritually? How do our eyes respond to light? It is artificial light that interests me the most; where the colour choice is the saturate hues available in chemical manufacture, that I will investigate with rigor, intregue and delight.

The pieces of work I have made up until this point have lead to more sculptural end-points, where the lamps act as divisions or additions within the space; never-the-less illuminating it. It has been a frustration of mine that when people visit my works/exhibitions they sometimes fail to notice the glorious reflections and reverberations of colour around the room. Colour theory at work. It is my job to direct people to look at what I want them too, as well as their surrounds.

I want to take away any structures and investigate the impact of coloured light on us as a pure form. Light fills spaces, like a painting or sculpture or video or a performance. Only in my future inquiries it is the viewer becoming the performer and the walls becoming a huge light painting.

 

Then in was Alana's turn to have a critique. She learned lots of things too, you can read her blog from our time at Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn here: alanatyson.tumblr.com

Day 2 - Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn Residency

After an interesting first day of exploring the estate where the Merz Barn is located, I tried to set myself to work on something, anything.

I struggled.

I had put way too much pressure on myself to fabricate something, but I did not know what to make. I had so many elements around me to explore, so many exciting forms and shapes, different colours, equipment and not a clue what to do with them all.

You could say I was overwhelmed.

I felt I should be making something. I felt I had a very limited amount of time on this residency in which to come away with something credible, exciting, final and/or lasting.  

I tried to make something out of found bamboo sticks; a shape in the landscape. My aim was to cover it in plastic and light from within; trying to think about a future commission I had been set. It didn't work, the bamboo was too weak to hold sturdy. It collapsed shortly after this photo was taken. Boo! But maybe that was a good thing, because if it had worked then I would of spent all week playing with that idea and that would not have allowed for new struggles, deliberations and new ideas.

After a moment of self-torment I grabbed a staple gun and a roll of plastic sheeting attached it to the length of a whole wall in the Shippon Gallery. This was to become the basis for the outpourings of my brain for the duration. A brain chart, a mind map, a spider diagram, whatever you call...

I started by en-circling four things to focus on:

• Why be an artist?
• What does my work intend to say/do?
• Why colour?
• Why light?

I added a few things initially, but then started pondering and scratching my head - hard! This residency was starting to push me mentally and emotionally. I never expected to feel like this, or be doing this. I expected to be making, but I wasn't.

I had brought some books with me on the off chance that I might pick them up for a read. Let me enlighten you on my reading habits - I don't! - I am dyslexic (aren't most artists?) and therefore struggle to read a chapter before instantly forgetting it, I find myself reading the same line over and over, I loose concentration and therefore I hate it, it is a chore.

But, BUT I decided, seeing as there was little else to do, except procrastinate by going on a lovely walk (which I didn't), that I should read. Part of the Merz Barn set-up includes a little yurt library that Ian and co built in a day. It is a cosy hub full of his art book collection, soft chairs and a heater. I curled up in there with a cup of green tea and got stuck in. I had selected David Batchelors newest essay 'The Luminous and the Grey' as my starting point.

 

For me this was a momentous occasion. The last book I read cover to cover (not sure I should be telling you this) was over 7 years ago!!!!

I began to recognise theories and arguments relating to the use of colour in out direct environments, it made sense. I hurriedly circled interested snippets and quotes. It felt like all my questions could be answered, whereas before I thought they couldn't and wouldn't be. This is not to say I haven't read around my subject, but instead I have dipped in and out of essays.

I made the decision to set myself mini-projects in response to and after I had read each chapter or section. A starting point.

Day 1 - Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn Residency

Arriving at the Cylinders Estate; the location of Kurt Schwitters Merz Barn in Cumbria, last Monday was like entering a little bubble. A bubble where life is simple and pure.

Fellow artist Alana Tyson and I were to be artists-in-residence for one week (13th - 19th October) in an attempt to push ourselves, our practices and perhaps an opportunity to spend some time together. I could have gone alone, but didn't want to, I felt that the opportunity would be perfect for the both of us and that the critique and conversation that we would engage with together would be helpful.

 

As soon as we arrived Ian Hunter gave us a tour of the grounds and then left us to it. It was time to explore. We made our beds, brought our (limited) bag of equipment into the residency space, unloaded our shopping for the week and made some lunch. It was glorious to just be able to sit outside and eat. A pleasure I rarely have at home as I am without a garden. 

There was a synergy between the indoors and the outdoors. Where the outside space acted as another room. I would step from one 'room' to another as I do in my house, except in this instance I was breathing in fresh air and sitting on a bench. 

I love the outdoors and wish I could spend more time in it. Just by having this simple pleasure I was starting to think about my future; where I might like to life one day; somewhere more rural perhaps?; How important was outdoor space to me? Very! etc, etc. How does living in the city effect my work and ideas? I tend to move too fast!

 

After lunch it was time to get to 'work'. But in this first instance, work did not mean making art, it meant the daily chores of living in the natural landscape. We chopped wood for the log burning stove, we fed the chickens, we retrieved our first fleshing laid egg, got the fire going and explored the woodlands surrounding us ready for potential pursuits in the week to come. 

  

As Autumn is well and truly upon us (Kurt Schwitters favourite time of year, as I am told to believe), the colours around us were of all hues. It was a treat to be a part of. Normally I am not a fan of this time of year as the darker nights draw in and the colder it becomes. I suffer from S.A.D and am frightened of the looming depression I always find myself in at this time of year. However, seeing the foliage change colour in front of my eyes and being outdoors and therefore making most of the natural light that I wouldn't usually see - as I would be wrapped up indoors - felt very different from this time of year in the city. 

It was the perfect time of year to take up residence in this type of setting for me. I also had a lot of questions to ask myself about my art practice; Why, why, why?

I had come a point where I wanted to question my ideas and bring in-depth context to the work. This residency was the perfect time to do this. I had one week, starting NOW.....